Alamak Hujan is playing at The Laundry tonight!!
(eh betul ke myspace dia orang ni)
(tapi aku ada date malam ni dengan si dia dari Djakarta)



p/s: Aku suka lagu 'Pagi yang Gelap'. The clouds nampak macam popcorns pagi ini. Semalam pun macam tu juga. Weird.

Fete de la Musique @ Alliance Francaise, 24th June 2007.

















Semua orang malas nak kerja ini hari. Increment sudah masuk, ada orang muka masam mencuka (including my boss huhu). I think my increment is ok. Alhamdulillah.

p/s: We saw Sharifah Amani @ AF. She is hawt with the bald head. Note to self: Lain kali nak mengurat Reza Salleh, jangan biarkan dia terkontang-kanting. Sorry Reza, I got distracted. Will take your photo next time around!

Jaja, if you ask me apa yang kita telah pelajari di tazkirah jumaat hari ini (pandainya ustazah buat ceramah supaya kami tak berlari ke warehouse sale loreal/maybelline waktu lunch time) hanya satu sahajalah yang sempat disalin:
"Jangan jadi sahabat seperti bulan gerhana yang muncul hanya sekali-sekala".
I don't know what ustazah was going on about for the rest of the ceramah. The usual anecdotes-lah tentang menjadi wanita muslimah etc.
*yawnYAWNyawn*

malas nak updet. balik ke kl, kerja tetap menimbun. as if everybody is waiting for me to come back. but that's not a big deal. i dont like ppl doing my work anyway. sejak balik dari kuching ni rasa macam blur sikit lah. maybe because i'm not feeling well. hopefully things will go back to normal when i get my bearings back in a couple of days. i miss my friends. let's hang out and waste money on minuman keras! just kiddin' lah.

staring at the picture, i wish my life boleh diundur. tak perlu banyak, sedikit cukuplah.

Greetings from Kuching!

Ex-bf masa kolej nak datang melawat (dia nak bagi ikan terubuk masin).
Aku kata - "Jangan jadi Tanggang".

Will be back Sunday.

suatu hari di pulau ketam:

"so natasya, ayah awak selalu fishing kat mana?"
"di US..."

so you can imagine lah why i was a bit reluctant to answer that question. nanti orang kata apa pula. but my dad was an avid angler back then. i remember sometimes we would head out in the freezing winter to go fishing. walaupun air sungai DeKalb semakin membeku, tapi dapat juga ikan! i'm just not sure why he stopped fishing altogether bila sudah pulang ke tanahair.

fishing trip to pulau ketam was fun. banyak juga ikan-ikan (kecil huhu) yang berjaya ditangkap. i slept most of the time sebab kena bangun 430 pagi. dan lelaki-lelaki pengail semua taknak pegang ikan so i was the tukang-cabut-mata-kail-dari-ikan. kih kih. but i'd definitely go there again.

ayat tipikal: will upload the photos later. it's been a busy month for me.

Pencinta Wanita versi Kelantan

Ho la terimo kasih banyok sebhak youtube ni lah opismate2 ambo dok gelok kak ambo sebhak ambo orghe kelate!

Tangan sudah mula seram sejuk. Sesejuk seperti going on a 1st date with the guy you like. No wait, i’m never nervous on a first date. Sejuk seperti menunggu nama dipanggil untuk ditemuduga. Or something like that. My point is, tangan ini sudah mula membeku kerana on the 5th of June my CEO yang tidak berbahasa Melayu itu mahu lihat 2 (dua / dos / yee / two) teks ucapannya yang ditulis oleh si penulis korporat ini yang juga masih terkial-kial menulis teks ucapan berbahasa Melayu. Ya ampun, dah hampir 2 tahun aku menjadi penulis teks ucapannya. Dah tak tahu nak goreng apa dah. Cut-and-paste, potong-dan-tampal teks2 ucapan sendiri sambil menceduk teks-teks orang lain (oops sori), masukkan peribahasa Melayu (untuk buat CEO / Chairman nampak seperti mereka menghargai budaya Melayu), masukkan ayat2 suci al-Quran (untuk buat CEO / Chairman nampak seperti mereka alim) semuanya telah kulakukan. Mati akal dah ni!

Kalau esok kedengaran lagu-lagu hardcore hip-hop from Cik Nate’s cubicle, faham2lah eh. Kepala tengah berserabut. Unless if i’m playing lagu-lagu jiwang Tompi then that’s a different story... ;)

mimpi. mencuri fonsel Zed Zaidi dan tertangkap lantas dikejar sekumpulan Oompa Loompa yang berparang. akhirnya dibuang daerah dan terkapai-kapai mencari bantuan, seseorang atau sesiapa yang sudi menyelamatkan diri ini.

realitas. dua minggu lalu. memandu di MRR2 lantas memotong sebuah perdana hitam. "Maaaaa!", jerit aku pada ibu. "Zed Zaidi!!!" Si ibu yang mata coklatnya masih belum sembuh dari pembedahan bertanya "betul ke? hensem tak". Dia hensem. Sehensem wajahnya ketika menjatuhkan talak terhadap Zeti. Namun, jelas dia tergolong di dalam coccoon yang terlalu teruja apabila dipandang. aku memotong keretanya sekali lagi. jeling sajalah. cukup.

sembilu kasih semakin intense. walaupun kadang kala tertidur (to my mother's dismay - because this is the only quality time i have for her these days - maaf ma! but you know-lah my weekends are crazy these days). Jumaat lalu aku dicubit Mama, "Bangun, dia orang dah bercerai. zety had a miscarriage". Haaaa!?! How can la be like that! Habis tu! Perempuan gediks yang putus tunang itu bersorak kegembiraan lah! Maka makin cerah lah peluangnya untuk meng-SHITWHATISTHEWORD fendi/zed zaidi!!

sometimes i say to myself, i watch too much tv. i could be right.

di endau

ungkapan laut di langit hitam
bintang dilihat dalam lautan
sangkutnya jala berukir hati
bagaikan cinta ku harap disisi
jaringan bibir bagaikan sesikat
nyiur dihanyut seimbas ombak
pohon ibu dilepas bayu
bagaikan hati menggisir batu
disinilah cinta menyerang aku
disinilah aku diserang kamu

Jalan Sesama (Indonesian version of Sesame Street) is so kiyoot! So when are we gonna get our own version eh?

Anyway, as expected, sudah ada orang membalas surat yang dilayang oleh wanita di Wellington itu semalam. 3 replies! Belum baca sepenuhnya lagi. Tengah asyik baca tentang kenaikan pencen. Sebentar lagi nak call my mother and tease her about the pay increase hee hee.

Gunkz - Cantik vidclip

I knowww, I'm 30 but I'm still a big fan of hip-hop. This is cool, sounds like Iwa K though.

Oh my God, you're kiddin right? Somebody actually sent a letter to Utusan Malaysia (sila rujuk pada suratkhabar tersebut ini hari) bertajuk:

Lelaki Melayu bermasalah?

*cringe*

Pada pendapat saya topik sebegini sesuai untuk suapan pembaca blogs sahaja tapi to actually send the letter to a local daily is is is ... so BITTER. Damn pei la weh!

Some excerpts: (i had to type this myself ok sbb cant find the online version and demi tidak menghampakan pembaca2 di sini (oh please) dan juga Cik Nate terpaksa menutup tajuk surat itu sbb nanti opismate buat spekulasi macam2 ttg my racial preference ho ho)

"Saya tidak faham mengapa lelaki Melayu mesti berkelakuan begitu buruk sekali."

"Golongan wanita tidak kira daripada bangsa apa pun, lebih selamat berada di kalangan lelaki Inggeris daripada bersama lelaki Melayu."

"Mereka perlu diajar menghormati wanita."

"Saya hendak berterus-terang; saya sudah bosan dengan sikap lelaki Melayu yang terus-terusan menimbulkan masalah dan sentiasa juga enggan mengaku itu ialah masalah mereka."

"Barangkali saya bersikap terlalu cauvinis wanita. Tetapi saya percaya cauvinis wanita tidak akan wujud jika puncanya tidak ada."

Ho ho Ho. Sungguh lantang wanita ini.

I have nothing to say. I'm looking forward to read the feedbacks/brickbats from disgruntled men or women yang bakal mengangkat wanita ini sebagai suara glokal mereka. *giggles sambil memandang sinis pada ofismate lelaki Melayu yang muka semakin merah apabila membaca warkah tersebut*

ayn

ayn
Originally uploaded by natinski.

Setelah penat bermain kejar-kejaran with my niece - Ayn terus ke tingkat atas untuk mengadu-domba kepada neneknya i.e. my mother:

Ayn: [undecipherable ramblings] Makcik kejar Ayn, bla bla bla
Mom: Makcik nak apa?
Ayn: MAKCIK NAK KAHWIN.

Cik Nate: .............

Hati ayahnya BERBUNGA RIA kerana puteranya seorang yang berilmu malah sentiasa dahagakan ilmu.
*falls asleep*

I'm at page 2 of Siddhartha. I know I can finish this, i just need to read it out loud in my head.

p/s: Congratulations to my sister Audra for winning the Anugerah Guru Cemerlang something-something award!

Kepala ni rasa macam nak meletups. how do men ppl manage to piss me off for 2 day straight?
I'd like to think that i'm the type of person who can handle anger graciously. i hate confrontations and if i feel that i dont need to explain/defend myself when i know i dont need to, then i'll just shut up. i mean seriously, you can look at me, and you can judge me for being the person that i am NOT. do you think i care? i'm so used to being stared at. sejak kecik lagi. no big deal man.

tapi ada jantan keparat sekor ni pinjam my thumbdrive(s) and i want them back! malasnya aku nak call dia and remind him over and over again that harta orang lain jangan disimpan lama2 nanti bila mati masuk neraka and all that, let alone nak tengok muka dia! Isk geram. Sakit kepala ni tau. Ok fine, i got the thumbdrives for free but still, they're mine!

Ok Cik Nate, think happy thoughts:



Er, that's my niece. Ada one day i went to her house and she cant stop saying "Makcik dah kahwin ke belum // Makcik bila nak kahwin" dalam segala intonasi berjuta-juta kali. Heh. I thought that was amusing. Serious! Makcik tak kisah kalau anak2 buah makcik semua tak sabar nak pakai baju flowergirls mereka. Iskhhh.

OK next happy thought.

Last Friday ketika cuba masuk ke sebuah kelab for their free-flow of margarita, the bouncer mintak check IC *roll eyes*. So i showed him my IC-lah. And he was like "woooooooooah". I just senyum jelah hor, and said "YES, I'M 30". Rupa-rupanya tahun ni adalagi ada orang nak check IC aku. Tsk.

Ok one more happy thought for the road. This is good, My anger is slowly surut.

I have a copy of my all-time favorite book Siddharta by Hermann Hesse in Bahasa Melayu!?! wtf . Tak sabar rasanya nak baca. Maybe i'll take a peek tonight. Tapi bila baca buku ni mesti nak letak the english version next to it kan? Just to compare. Anal.

DJ Altimet aku sayang sama kamu! (ye ye DJ Fuzz kamu juga)

>> My English rant space is down. So tumpang sini sekejap.

“I’m depressed!”
Most of the time it will fall to deaf ears because my friends hear that all the time but this week alone I’ve had 3 friends shouting back at me “Nate, you’re not depressed!”. Ok fine, let’s just call it temporary insanity then. Or a bad funk that I occasionally have when things are not going my way. Or maybe I’m just getting depression and boredom all mixed up. Poo.

Hatta, who left yesterday morning for Bali (for 10 days – damn I wish I was a surfer with no commitments like him) gave me a chaste kiss on the forehead before departing and looked straight into my teary eyes and said “do something ok”.

But I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I’m okay, most of the time I’m not ok. I hate public holidays because I never make plans. I have great friends but sometimes I feel like I’m burdening them with the weight of the world. I never tell my family anything because I’m a big girl who always pulls her shit together. I stayed at home to read and vegetate yesterday. It felt ok because a good book is always a good company. I went out for some groceries at the shopping mall nearby and on my way home I was at a red light, and ohmygod, I didn’t know how I got there. How did my synapse managed to bypass my clouded mind and tell my foot to stop at a red light and not crash into the car in front of mine? While watching tv with Hatta the night before he said “you’re watching tv but your mind is somewhere else”. But where has my mind wandered?

Fin.

P/s: Dear Blake, please bring blonde back. You give Bon Jovi a baaaad name. A squat revelation: Mr Tumnus is actually James McAvoy. I had no idea! I love my !E tv.

Tiap kali jumpa Girl, kita discuss pasal banyak benda. the pattern is the same but never dull. kita discuss pasal our families,then kita discuss about my bad (ex & wannabe) boyfriends; our next holiday and then kita discuss pasal AHMAD DHANI. kita discuss pasal ahmad dhani macam dia tu sedara kita sendirilah. paling recent is "kalau Dewa berpecah, kita nak ikut sapa?" Ahmad Dhani and his trails of domestic problems or Andra Ramadhan and his awesome new band? hehe.

Hatta is leaving for Bali on wednesday. for 10 bloody days. woi! mana aci! Habis siapa nak teman aku tengok TV malam2? Anyway, i think i want to ask him to seludup Angga masuk so that he can be my slave kat rumah.

Dah bosan sangat la ni. 75% of the staff (i think so, my maths is bad) is on leave. so technically, my kerja pun tak jalan. But i managed to finish a speech within an hour. speech bahasa melayu! damn i'm getting at this. either that or my cut-and-paste skills are getting better. and i forgot to eat breakfast too! excellent progress (because nasi lemak is evil and pihak kerajaan harus memantau gelaja makan nasi lemak for breakfast ini). semalam cuba crash diet tapi by the time nak masuk petang, kepala aku sudah mula pening2. lagipun i only managed to get 2 hours of sleep the night before. so had to call Girl dan seperti biasalah, lepak di Suzy's Corner. Entah apsal kami suka sangat lepak di sini. But the lamb chop and roti john istimewa there mmg sedap. termasuk mashed potato layered with melting cheese. oh yum! there goes my diet.
i'm semi-miserable today. it will all end soon.

Been listening to Imran Ajmain. Best-best.

Sayang, yang sudah tu sudah,
Nangis tidak berlagu, lagi...
Sayang, yang sudah tu sudah,
Bunga tiada bermadu, lagi..

i let myself fall...

i let myself fall...
Originally uploaded by natinski.

Cik Nate single lagi (sbb tu tak datang poetry reading semalam - tengah sibuk retail theraphy aaand jumpa Shah lagi). Oh well. Kepala tengah pening sikit ini hari. I did the stupidest thing last night. Aish, tak serik-serik! Takpelah, nanti Cik Nate tanggung sendiri.

"Sekebun cinta yang berbunga!!!"

Yes. Kat rumah ni. Baru habis nonton Sembilu Kasih [because wtf there is nothing to watch on a friday and i miss my mom]. I keep asking ppl the same question: "ada ke pasangan kekasih atau suami-isteri yang membahasakan diri mereka kau-aku in their relationship?"
Most likely not. Tapi kalau i ada jumpa pasangan macam ni i'm gonna say to them : "WOW you allz cakap macam Sembilu Kasih!!!"

Semalam aku nampak ex-bf aku on tv (the one yang berjaya buat hati aku remuk dan bergantung pada valium untuk beberapa bulan). Jantung aku terhenti seketika. I cried the entire night. I couldnt help myself. Aku tahu aku dah move on but i just couldnt help myself. I’m sorry.

Shah has been calling me often (huarggh kiyoot-nya dia). Lebih kerap dari si bf yang begitu sibuk dengan kerja sehingga tiada masa untuk aku. I hate HATE feeling neglected like this. I should keep myself occupied. Not with Shah, no. I’m not even sure if i like him pun. Aergh, lelaki mmg buat kepala aku berserabut!

Eh, DJ Cza on tv. Oh kiyoot nya dia.

rasa ralat / off tangent sedikit pada hari ini:

1. ceo mood baik. dia pakai tali leher azimat dia. hari ini kan hari rabu. dia kata air suam yang aku sediakan untuk dia rasa seperti dibeli di hotel hilton. dia emang sarkastik begitu tetapi hari ini dia senyum. mood baik mood baik.
2. untuk perkataan 'fee', kami tidak lagi menggunakan terjemahan 'caj' sebaliknya 'fi'. Fi !!! Jangan buat aku benci pada bahasa sendiri.
3. 2 more colleagues of mine dah tender. kebosanan bekerja bakal dirasai.
4. the death of ivan ilyich by leo tolstoy is a really good book. buat aku terfikir tentang mati. well, hari2 pun fikir tentang ini especially apabila manusia-manusia yang pakai kereta bikin mula memotong / mencucuk kereta aku dan cara pemanduan aku yang berhemah ini. hee hee.
5. esok cuti. nak buat apa eh?

In my email today:

Assalamualaikum & Hi

TV9 is 1 year old! You are invited to “Kenduri Setahun TV9”. The details are as follows:

Date : 3rd May 2007

Time : 4:30 – 6:30pm

Venue : Saloma Bistro, KL

Dress Code : Traditional / Formal

Hmm menarik ni. Rasa-rasa Mohd Pierre Andre datang tak?

Semalam me and the girls went to see our friends from Jakarta play at a local club. Tempat yang dipenuhi dengan manusia pelbagai bangsa dan saiz perut itu sudah hampir 2 tahun tidak dikunjungi. I was feeling a bit tired but sbb dah lama x jumpa Michael we headed to the club anyway. Michael dan band-nya masih seperti dulu, great showmanship, excellent tunes dan dalam masa 4 jam aku berjaya menepis lelaki-lelaki keji yang memandang wanita seperti sekeping steak Victoria Station yang lazat. I’m just there to enjoy the music. Besides, a no means no la kan. Jangan la nak merayap tangan tu.

Tapi...

Before the night ends, i met someone new. Dia kiyooot sangat. Shah namanya. English pun bagus (badabing!). Senyuman sejuta miliyar. Lepas tu dia minta aku teka umur dia. Disebabkan Cik Nate selalu sangat berkenalan dengan anak-anak ikan yang bawah umur, i said “23”.

“I look THAT young? I’m 28”.

Saat tu, tiba2 kepala Cik Nate berdengung dengan “HALLELUJAH!” dan rasa seperti ada sinar bercahaya di hujung terowong yang gelap. Masih ada single men yang umur sudah cukup baik untuk berumahtangga!

He took my number and promised to keep in touch. Seperti biasa aku tak ambik number dia (hantuk kepala) kerana i dont believe in hooking up with guys that i meet in clubs. Maaf, mereka terlalu keji buat aku (walaupun i’ve heard happy ending stories about people meeting their soulmate di disko – including my boss!). Fine, pernah lah aku buat sekali. Tapi itu Sheridan. He was a pilot and lives in Perth anyway so a little fling wouldnt hurt. Anyway, kenapa mereka keji? Because if they can hook up with me, surely setiap kali mereka pergi club they can hook up with other girls too. Ini insecurity aku berkata-kata. I want a real relationship, and this is just not the place to be looking for my perfect man. Besides, let me tell you a secret la, lelaki2 hensem ni? Most of them mmg nampak kiyoot di bawah lampu disko, ha cubalah meet up with them during the day. Takde la hensem sangat pun... La la la.

On our way home, my friend Nanie tanya aku, “Immy, macamana you mengurat orang eh? Cute la mamat tu”
“hoh?” Aku tak pandai jawab soalan ini. Tapi modus operandi aku simple. Bila aku dah nampak orang yang aku suka, just pandang dia la. Senyum. Body language is important, tapi jgn nampak slutty. If you can dance, itu your bonus point. Then just let it be. Kalau ada letupan kimia antara you dengan dia, then the rest is history. Kalau takde, just enjoy the night. Tak mati lah kalau tak dapat lelaki yang you nak. ;)

Keesokan harinya,

Aku dah tak ingat muka Shah.

HaHA that is SO me. Aku tahu dia kiyoot. Macam anak Yusof Haslam. No wait, i think Shah lagi kiyoot lah. Memeluk Shah umpama memeluk sebatang tiang yang dibaluti bantal empuk yang wangi. Dalam erti kata lain, dia tinggi, body best dan smells nice. WAKAKA.

Sekian cerita saya untuk hujung minggu ini yang tiada unsur2 moralistik langsung. Rasa bebas bila tidak berada di club yang sama dengan boyfriend aku yg berumur 23 tahun itu. Soalan biasa dia bila we are apart: Ada minum / hisap weed / mengorat jantan lain? Di mana jawapan aku will be the eternal firm NO. He must not know. Aku tak sanggup kantoi lagi. Kalau tak pasti ada tong sampah yang tak bersalah akan melayang lagi...

p/s: Shah did call. Dia nak jumpa aku lagi. Ohh temptation! I said no, not today, maybe we’ll meet at the same club next weekend. Pleaselah, aku belum bersedia untuk main kayu tiga. Tolonglah percaya! ;)

Well, you know, just in case. ;)

p/s: Aku rindu kat anak buah aku.

Fair Play please!

Fair Play please!
Originally uploaded by natinski.

I think sometimes the weather gets to me. I miss things / person that i can no longer have. Sejak dua menjak ni merindui Kota Bharu. Fine, the weather is as bad as Dante's Inferno but I miss KB. Food is always on top of my list but would it be crazy to admit that i still miss my dad terribly. I miss him macam he's still alive, as if i can just call him to tell him that i'm coming home so that we can go to PCB just to sit by the beach, atau entah pergi ke mana entah for fishing. Or sometimes just drive around the towns in Kelantan without a purpose.

Rasanya entri ini terlalu personal pulak. But i miss him dammit.

"Apsal muka ketat je ni"

Favorite sentence at the moment. Whatever that means. But i get that everyday this week.

"Masih pending la Cik Natasya", kata si wanita HR yang mungkin sudah muak mendengar suaraku.

Saat-saat begini rasa seperti mahu berhenti kerja serta-merta dan tinggal di rumah sahaja.

You know, bulan lepas my face keluar majalah. keluaran bulan Mac. majalah fesyen. didnt tell anybody about it except my close friends and siblings and my ex boss. in fact my ex boss lah orang pertama who bought the magazine! ingatkan dia dah lupa. isk malu.

few weeks back, masa nak masuk the usual club that i normally frequent on saturdays, si liz penjaga club tegur aku. we dont normally talk because she just know me as the 'awek si DJ'. anyway,

liz to everyone: ok masuk masuk // you're on the list // tengok IC bla bla bla
liz to me : awak Immy Natasya nanti kejap! takleh masuk
me : uik? (sejak bila dia tahu nama penuh aku niiiiiii)
liz : awak keluar majalah ehhhhhhhhh. cantik.
me : itu bukan sayaaaaaaaaaaa! *lari masuk*

Malu. Tak suka sangat bila ppl found out.

Plus, ada akak sorang kat opis pun terperasan jugak. Dia hantar emel:

"hari ahad tu kita gi saloon rambut...kita baca majalah [insert nama majalah] bulan ni..kita nampak wajah awak la..."
alamaaaaaaaaaaaak!!!
"ehehe...kita x kisah pun...sekali tgk x perasaan ...belek lagi skali tgk mcm kenal je pompuan ni...bila baca nama dah sah ni bdk **** [nama syarikat] jngan Haji *** ******* [nama big boss alim] baca sudah la...tapi kita rasa tuan haji x baca majalah cam tu...kata dia x berkat nnti company...

adehhh pedas jugak emel akak ni. tak berkat nanti company? ntah apa2 ntah. gambar tu bukan seksi pun!?!

Actually this post is supposed to be longer tapi kepala rasa berat sangat ni. Makan ubat flu. Doktor cakap ubat ni tak mengantuk. Doktor tipu!

Tadi saja je call dia tanya dia di mana. Dia di kedai Brothers. Suara dia macam tergagap-gagap sikit.

No, he's not cheating on me.

I think I'm getting a car accessory for my birthday (tolonglah jangan, aku belum bersedia untuk jadi gadis litar dia).

Roy balik la cepat... :(

Saya sudah pulang. It's good to be back you know? Maybe we'll never compete with the Singaporeans tapi entahlah, rindu sangat pada hospitality rakyat2 Malaysia - isk serius ke aku yang berkata begini? Lagipun tak pernah berenggang dengan si boyfriend yang berumur 23 tahun itu hehe.

Will upload some photos later. Nak makan nasi lemak dulu ni.

p/s: Many thanks to F for the accomodation! Jangan lupa baca karangan bahasa Melayu yang saya telah letakkan di atas meja untuk anda baca. :D

Rasa macam terdesak sangat nak update di sini tapi tidak tahu nak cerita tentang apa. oooh kejap, nak browse website2 yang menghambakan diri mereka untuk AF5. Kelas Bahasa Inggeris tu berapa kali seminggu? It's very amusing. Rasa macam mahu muntah darah gigit bibir sampai berdarah when there are grammar mistakes. But i have faith that with a lot of practice mereka akan dapat menguasai BI at a satisfactory level (tipu! To perfect your English you need a lot of reading and practice ok!). If you ask me who's my favorite student this season, mestilah Dafi. Isn't he the cutest thing? Hehe.

On a serious note, i turn 30 on the 25th. Saja je nak ingatkan diri sendiri (iye, dan orang-orang lain juga). Belum decide untuk buat apa lagi. Mula2 ingat mahu adakan parti 'nafsu berserakah' (awesome phrase! aku belajar dari filem 300) but OF COURSE I'M JUST KIDDING YOU GUYS. Isk. No plans yet. Tapi cuti 3 hari for my birthday (aku mmg ambik cuti on my birthday every single year) takkan nak melepak/melepek di rumah sahaja ye dak?

OKlah need to do some work. Semalam pergi pasar malam near my old university. Masa tengah tunggu si apek goreng apakenama carrot cake kegemaranku masa uni dulu, tiba2 ada pak Arab ni sorang datang approach aku. "Are you Malay?" So aku jawab "Hell yeah I'm Malay, man. What's up?". "Is this halal?" "Er, yes, Halal. Halal." Rasanya halal lah. InsyaAllah halal. Makan tanpa was-was. Pleaselah, benda tu mesti halal kan. Orang Melayu memang suka makan, apa.. Dah bertahun dah uncle tu ada kat pasar malam. Sure halal punya lah!

Oh shit.

Wayang Kata III, No Black Tie, 7 Mac 2007.

Psst...
Bisik pada dia ya?
Bahawa aku berterima kasih untuk segalanya
Sudah penat digelar pendera si anjing, si hati batu, si wanita sihir
Tapi dia sebagai seorang sahabat
Masih menerima aku seadanya.

went for my medical check up today. the doctor completely refused to speak English to me so you can imagine la macamana our conversation is like. kalau bm dia berhabuk ok la.

ada satu soalan yang dia tanya:

doc: mngndong?
me : huh?
doc: mngndong?
me : what?
doc: mngndong? PREGNANT?
me : [ala bini Norbit] Heyll no doc, i'm not pregant nobody's trying to knock me up nuh-uh, heyyy~.

So now i'm nervous waiting for my urine test result pulak. my boyfriend, the posterboy for Belia Benci Dadah has nombor telefon PENGASIH on his speed dial - "just in case you tak lepas your urine test". Ha ha. So not funny. *sigh*

he turned 23 yesterday. cita2 dia nak kahwin umur 30. so that makes me 37 at that time. nice.

Happy (belated) birthday too to Nadia Circusitch, Zuhri best-ex-boss-in the-world and Sara Cantik. You are loved!

kueh

kueh
Originally uploaded by natinski.

I know, dah lama tak update di sini bukan? The speech that i was struggling to finish akhirnya siap juga. But! Ada satu lagi speech menanti! Adeh. Padan muka Cik Nate.

I've gotten myself a part-time job to make ends meet. Bukannya sesak sangat pun (duit orang pinjam dari aku walaupun dibayar tidak mencukupi aku sudah halalkan) but next month diharapkan dapat menyambut hari lahir dengan meriah sekali.

So many things in my head right now. Macam mana nak juggle everything at the same time eh?

Ok back to my speech. Da.

Kepala tengah pening kerana sekali lagi diberikan tugasan berat untuk menulis pulitzer prize winning teks ucapan untuk si Presiden yang bahasa Melayunya masih di dalam longkang (fakta ini penting dalam menjelaskan bahawa my written Malay is far far better than him). Over the phone bersama seorang teman beberapa hari lalu tiba2 saya ter-emo dan menjerit "i dont want to speak Malay anymore!" dan pada saat dramatik itulah juga si Presiden yang masih menantikan teks ucapannya yang tak siap2 ini lalu di samping dan mula mengerutkan dahinya itu. Oops.

I refuse to use the word 'endosmen' in official letters. Buruk sangat bunyinya kan?

cik nate, cik nate, bekukanlah hatimu itu lagi
sooner or later everybody is going to give up on you

one just did.

arrival card

arrival card
Originally uploaded by natinski.

yeargh tersalah tulis dalam arrival card. sejak bila bapa saya bernama 'malay'? kih kih.

Sila jangan betulkan blog ini. Yes, that is the infamous Ina Naim a.k.a. jilted tunang of Mawi. Kami satu flight dengan dia, pergi dan balik. Apparently ada lawatan ke Bali bersama Ina. HA HA!

At least on the way to surga Denpasar ada Daphne Iking dalam flight. Dia kahwin di Bali woh*. Tapi on the way back to hell KL terpaksa la tengok muka Ina tu. No i have nothing against her. You think I want to waste my precious time mengutuk artis2 Malaya yang tiada bakat and make money out of their misery ke? Please lah.

So anyway, you knowlah kalau lambat masuk dalam flight AirAsia pastinya kena duduk berasingan. That’s because kami nyaris tertinggal flight because I decided to do a version of Ada Apa Dengan Cinta: Aku lari keluar airport last minute to see Angga, my new friend from Bali. But will talk about that later. *wink wink*
[teringat kat Angga]

Hey, berhenti mengelamun!

Oh so ya, saya TERPAKSA duduk di antara 2 MAKCIK2 yang menyertai rombongan tersebut. Beberapa fakta:

1. Ina Naim ada bodyguard who happens to be her cousin.
2. Makcik2 itu ikut rombongan kerana memberi sokongan kepada Ina yang “baru meningkat naik”
3. 60 orang telah menyertai rombongan ini
4. tiada ahli rombongan yang muda kelihatan. Semuanya makcik2!
5. ina naim mekap sendiri.

But i must say i had fun with the makciks. Terpaksa lah tutup aurat sebab rasa bersalah haha. Makcik di sebelah kanan kasi aku makan waffle yang dia curi dari Hotel Ramada (hey we stayed here last time!) dan Makcik di sebelah kiri kasi aku minyak cap kapak sebab aku bersin tidak henti (selepas menangis ketika flight took off).


Makcik Kanan sedang meneliti gambar kenang-kenangan bersama rombongan Cik Ina Naim ke Bali!

Ina Naim, Ina Naim. *geleng kepala* Would be more fun if i had met Mawi instead eh?

Note: Thanks to Girl kerana menjadi paparazo dalam flight. Girl kata dia terdengar ina tanya bodyguard dia: “kalau naik flight selalu telinga pekak macam ni ke?” BWAHAHA.


* Untuk berkahwin di Bali, pasangan perlu menganut agama yang sama. *pelamin angan musnah*

mercure

mercure
Originally uploaded by natinski.

Taknak balik Mesia! No wait, I'm already back in KL. *sakit hati*

Ok see you guys next week. Da!

Shopping ke kak?
Hmm.
Berdua je?
Berlima tadi.
Banyak akak shopping. Akak ni Melayu ke?
Uhuh.
Ingatkan mat salleh tadi, tapi saya dengar akak cakap Melayu.
Saya Melayu.
Saya kerja kat sini kak. *tunjuk kad rumah kebajikan* Tolong2 sikit. Buat kebajikan. Akak pun boleh menderma. Kesian kat mereka ni.
*** Takpelah dik, akak kerja kat MERCY. Ni pun baru balik dari Johor. Tolong orang kena banjir. Buat kebajikan.
Oh ye ke kak?! Akak gi mana? Batu Pahat ke Kota Tinggi? Saya orang Kota Tinggi.
*gulp* Er, dua-dua.
Banjir lagi ke Batu Pahat? Kota Tinggi dah surut kan.
Masih banjir dik. Lagipun dia orang buka empangan tu sebab dah penuh. Mungkin Batu Pahat lambat sikit surut. *goes off ranting about Tengku Mahkota Johor sudah murka and ecological effect towards tourism and shite*
Ohh.
Oklah dik, akak nak sambung shopping ni. Assalamualaikum.
Waalaikumsalam.

*** Tipu sunattttt! So sorry!

“Cinta pertama indahnya bagai bulan nan purnama, tapi kegagalan cinta adalah bagaikan dimakan gerhana.”

Pergh. From Pengantar Berpacaran: Psycologie Muda-mudi by Abdullah Masrur M.H.
Definitely must look for this book once i land in boemi Indonesia nanti. One week to go!

I have the best friends in the world – because they put up with my infantile self:

“Riz said to tell you anjang aki is his relative”
Itu Girl punya SMS.

And then there’s an email from Neri:

Did you catch last night’s dunia baru when muhamad adif st-st-st-stuttered when he conversed with the junior-girl SO CUTE I wished it’d happened to me I’d pretend-die and go to *heaven*

And also Ari sent me an MMS – a screenshot of muhamad adif masa dia tengah tergagap-gagap itu.

Kih kih so cute kan? Especially bila dia berkata “shophan shanthunnnn”. Hee. Keren banget!

So that should keep me happy for the rest of the day today. Btw, jangan call saya ajak minum-minum ini hari – I lost my voice. Adeh.

"ia plankton yang jahat"
~ kata sahabat SpongeBob SquarePants dalam bahasa Melayu di TV9.

giggle giggle, giggle giggle.

No I am not related to Anjang Aki thank you.

Tiap kali pergi konsert, mesti hujan. Semalam di konsert Samsons, berghhhh menggigil kesejukan. It was ok, I mean, you can't really complain when an Indonesian band play yeah?

Semalam sakit hati with some ugly Malaysians. Nak je aku langgar mamat dalam kereta Kancil tu. Dia ingat ini jalan bapak dia. Urgh long story. I could make a movie out of queueing for 15 minutes just to pay parking at KL Sentral tu.

Dah la balik rumah lift rosak! And i live on the 7th floor ok!

OK enough whining. Mari kita jadi wanita yang independent yeah!

So semalam i saw Anjang Aki at the hospital right? Dia pengantin baru kan? Muka dia berseri, he looks healthy and kasut dia berkilat wakaka. He's smiling all the time too. Baguslah.

Then adala patient ni sorang pergi jumpa Anjang Aki and said:
"Assalamualaikum! Pelakon popular kan?!"
(oh course lah, Anjang Aki had to say yes)

Funniest thing i've ever seen at the hospital i tell you. Even my mom thought it was funny.

I'm watching Remp-It ni. I have no idea what they're talking about man.

Selamat Tahun Baru ok?

Ok I’m gonna write this on top of my head ala lazy blogger yang tak buat homework. Well, it’s a personal choice really. I havent had my obligatory morning nescafe kow so i’m a bit cranky. Ok maybe VERY cranky. The nasi lemak is good though.

So yeah, ELARTI is finally seeing the light of day and will be launched at Seksan this coming Saturday. Woohoo! If you look closely, my name is in there as well. Tu ha, atas nama Nazri M. Annuar (si lelaki frinjan menantikan bulan bernama Elyana jatuh ke riba tu). So you guys go check it out lah. Those Amazing Malays Boys (walaupun Ruhayat takde la amazing sangat kyu kyu kyu) are really talented and selfless in menegakkan literati Melayu dan baik hati dan hensem (ok dah now hand me my copy of Elarti now!). Do come. Fairul Nizam will be reading his beautiful poems, he’s an excellent poet and baik hati, and sentiasa tersenyum (ok dah now hand me the postcards you bought from Japan!). Hikhik.

See you there. No, i wont be attending. But do come, free wine y’all!

eta: I just got to know i'm supposed to read my piece that day! Oh too bad.

Get this:

I was sleeping petang tu, hari ahad, tidur petang. biasalah, siesta bila tengah hujan memang best. Then aku terjaga, sebab ada orang panggil aku. It was my arwah father. So real, bunyi macam dia berada di luar bilik sahaja.


Sometimes I worry that one day i can no longer remember his voice, his smile, his laughter. Takut jika aku terlupa semua itu, aku akan jadi anak derhaka.

Tapi petang tu dia panggil nama aku. Rasa macam mahu terus berlari ke pintu and just yell at him, "I'm coming Ba! Jangan tinggal Amy!" like I always do. Walaupun ia cuma mainan tidur, tapi cukuplah.

This bakal mak mertua Khatijah Tan lady is very funneh i tell you. i look forward to watch Dunia Baru on Mondays all that the time. Not to mention, the weekly reminder i get from an Elyana hardcore fan. Hmpfth, minah sekeping macam tu pun boleh ada yang minat.

Semalam, masa nak tidur, tiba-tiba aku terfikir, kenapa agaknya Mohd Adif Mohd Pierre Andre selalu dapat watak lelaki innocent (yang pasti aku dump selepas aku main kayu tiga dengan bestfriend dia - ini probability jelah ok).

Imagine kalau dia jadi polis:
"Jangan bergherhak, thsaya pholisth"

Imagine kalau dia jadi penjahat:
"Thsaya tembak awak thsebab thsaya jahat"

Kalau dia BF aku:
"Thsaya thsayang awak, Natassssssya".

Kih kih. He's so adorable lah. Dalam filem Cinta, aku suka dia biasa-biasalah. Can't say much about his character though, sampai bila dia nak jadi si naif macam ni? Bila dia nak berlakon jadi si pemukul isteri, si pembunuh bersiri, si lelaki korporat hidung belang, si anak derhaka hisap ganja?

I found this while googling for Pierre Andre. Mana tahu kalau dia ada blog ke.....


Cool!

Sedih. EJ's last day today. Aku hantar dia sampai lobby and kami sama2 menangis. Buat masa sekarang I can only wish the best for him.



Tomorrow I'm back to being a WonderbraSuperWoman again. I need a strong drink for this. *sigh*

Rugi lah you all tak datang. Best tau. Hmm, let’s see some photos! Kepala berserabut. My assistant dah resign, esok last day. Habis aku nak gossip pasal boss aku dengan siapa?

Other Reading @ Seksan photos can be viewed at my Natasya in The Sky.







Ehhhh, tersesat gambar Siti. Taken at the NST Group open house. Orang lain dok sibuk bergambar dengan Siti, Erra, Hans, Camelia, Anita etc etc, aku pi bergambar dengan Mawi. MAWI!?! I have photographic proof! (in which shall be destroyed soon enough. Nanti kena gossip. Kih Kih. omgicantbelieveibergambarwithmawi

p/s: I just realized that there are some ppl who read this are not aware of my English diary. Hoh? Then how did you guys get here? There’s more sex, drama and tragedy di sana! Hehe. That’s ok. You can stay here if you like. Thanks for reading! Dah dah jangan ajak aku keluar blind date, I don’t exist. ;)

Ini entry yang ke 101!

walaupun muka berjerawat lima dan tidak suka di-photograph, semalam ku gagahkan jua ke sebuah tasik for a sesi outdoor portraiture. just me & nerissa and 5 photographers. mereka suruh lompat, kami lompat. mereka suruh duduk atas rumput basah, kami duduk. tapi bila mereka suruh aku think happy thoughts, i couldnt think of any. malu tak terhingga. takut pun ada sebenarnya.takut lensa kamera berjaya mengupas segala kesedihan dan apa yang terbuku di hati. will they be able to tell?

walaubagaimanapun i had lots of fun. a new experience which i look forward to doing again. thanks guys.

* gambar di atas was taken yesterday. the only photo i managed to take (yelah, sbb most of the time i was in front of the cameras). the grass was wet ok!

"You're a mess"
AWAK SELEKEH.

Uergh, memang aku sudah obses dengan translation. It's not supposed to mean appearance dia lah wehh, the statement refers to her life! Hidup dia! Yang kelam kabut itu! A mess! Faham?!?

*headache*

Pic: That's my niece, baru lepas makan nasi.

hello,

"did you drop acid"

is not equivalent to

"awak menumpahkan asid"

Nggghh, rasa mau mati aku tengok House kali ini.

Siri bercakap dengan diri sendiri:

Okay okay tahun ini kita buat macam tahun lepas. Kita masuk zon minda atmosfera yang lain. Kita balik kampung one day before Raya (dengan alasan tiket habis), kita pergi sembahyang Raya dengan Sultanah Kelantan, kita ziarah kubur, then Raya ke-3 kita cabut balik KL. Apa susah? Tak susah! Kalau orang tanya bila nak kahwin, kita kata tahun depan (like we always do). Kalau orang kata kita dah kurus, kita kata “eh ya ka?” walaupun dalam hati kita malu kena puji. Biarlah kakak kita yang pandai mengipas sedara-mara tu do all the talking. Asalkan kita tahu kita tak hipokrit dan kita harus bersyukur, sekurang-kurangnya kita masih dapat balik kampung* makan banyak-banyak, menayang bodi langsing, mengenyit mata kat anak sultan kelantan, membeli tudung bawal, memotong rambut dengan harga jauh lebih murah dari stylist di KLCC, menatap langit yang kurang berjerebu, lepak dengan kengkawan KL yang turut di/ter-paksa beraya di KB dan lain-lain lagi.

This is probably my last update before Raya lah ok. Semoga you all berbahagia. Adeh, tak syoknya Raya.

* Ariff, semoga tabah beraya di hospital. Fight it!

Semalam, ketika memandu pada jam 3pagi (hujan ketika itu – funny how hujan memainkan peranan penting bila mood sedang goyah) aku ternampak sepasang kekasih di tepi lebuhraya. Si lelaki sedang memeluk tiang letrik sambil si gadis memeluknya dan menangis. *roll eyes*

Hai, si gadis, jangan termakan dengan drama si lelaki itu. Air mata hanya sementara, suatu hari nanti si lelaki akan berubah angin dan tidak akan mencintai/memujuk rayu agar menerimamu kembali.

Hai, si lelaki, peluk lah tiang letrik yang basah itu kuat-kuat. Bagaimanakah agaknya tajuk utama di dada akhbar jika kau terkena kejutan elektrik nanti.

Untuk pihak lebuhraya, sila pantau adengan-adengan drama spektra ini. Mengganggu konsentrasi pengguna-pengguna lebuhraya sahaja (ini semua pengaruh drama Sembilu Kasih* ni – tak sah kalau tak bergaduh dalam hujan).

* Mengikut rating terbaru yang diterima oleh pihak MediaPrima, Sembilu Kasih menduduki tempat teratas bagi rancangan yang paling ramai penonton.

Ini hari I have one more speech dalam bahasa Melayu to finish. Ustaz Z janji nak kasi some hadith to selit dalam the speech (ye lah, bulan puasa ni kita kasi Islamik sikit la) and after that i can work on my article to be sent to the Halal Journal. Yeah! I can do it!

I finally get to taste the murtabak roti jala yang diwar-warkan itu. hmmm, biasa je rasa dia? A clever innovation tapi I think i'll stick to murtabak biasa je lah.

Some things that i want to eat yang belum dapat:
- Nasi padang (esok! Rizal hang jangan lupa temu janji kita! eh ke aku ada temu janji lain? Hmm)
- Kek batik (hari tu ada beli di pasar Ramadhan Bandar Tasik Selatan. Tapi lupa letak kat mana. Kemungkinan besar sudah dibuang)
- Karipap sardin (juga sudah dibeli tetapi tertinggal di rumah seseorang dan seseorang itu telah makan kesemuanya tanpa memberitahu saya!)
- Meatballs IKEA
- Murtabak Greenwood (yang ni takpe sebab gerainya sentiasa ada)
- Kebab Melawati
- Makaroni bakar (ini specialty kakak sulung saya)

Heh itujelah. Pagi-pagi dah pikir nak makan apa.

Masih ingat lagi budak customer service yang suka jerit nama aku tu? Dia baru saja melangsungkan perkahwinannya, well a couple of months back actually.
Kita memang berkawan baik lah, he's one of those friends yang wajib ada di setiap pejabat bagi mengisi kekosongan hidup apabila bekerja.
Hari ni since ada some transaction that needs to be done, aku pergi la mengadap dia. Well, dia selalu datang office aku sebenarnya, to chit chat.

Tahu tak dia cakap apa?!?

"Saya nak awak tahu walau apa pun saya tetap cintakan awak" <-- Please note that dia cakap begini ketika counter sedang sibuk. Gila ke apa budak ni?!?

Wahlau!

Oh, ada lagi dia tambah:
"Tu lah awak, lambat."

Aik? Habis saya yang bersalah? Bukan ke masa aku start kerja di bangunan itu dia dah ada awek ke?
Malu lah dia cakap macam tu. Tahu la dia main2 tapi eerrrgh, orang sebelah masa tu dah senyum2 kambing kat kami. Aergh malu!

on another note, over dinner with Aid last weekend, dia tanya pasal Teman Lelaki.
She said "you know i told Angie that you guys text each other in Malay and she doesnt believe it at all!"
Hee hee. Believe it baby.

Semalam Azman called:

Him: Immmmmy, mari kita ke kelas agama malam ini!
Me : Er, sorry la beb. I’ve got dinner plans tonight. But lemme know when is the next class ok!

Didnt have the heart to tell him that i was gonna go out drinking to celebrate my 1 year anniversary working for this shithole.

Tapi yeah, my point is, that’s my life. Kontras antara good and evil begitu besar. Some ppl pernah cakap that i’m rather conflicted, but that’s just me, I just cant decide if I wanna be good or bad. Both are more challenging. But hey, i guess the occasional pros-and-cons; langit dan bumi; baik dan jahat; are not so bad at all.

While i’m at it, i got myself a new boyfriend semalam(who will be referred as Teman Lelaki from now on haha) . Dia Melayu to the bone, kita cakap-cakap dalam bahasa Melayu. Rasa pelik, but i’m getting used to that. Macam ayam dan itik, but he makes me laugh. Kontras kami begitu besar, but you know what they say about opposite attracts. Maybe i should introduce him to you guys one day, then you’d know what i mean.

Aku dah tak di awangan lagi, because my feet is firmly on the ground. :)

pink

pink
Originally uploaded by natinski.

I was at the Estee Lauder Breast Cancer Awareness Program Charity Auction thing semalam. 2 tables away from me was Emran, si bachelor terhebat Malaya (hai, bila agaknya dia nak kahwin). Terfikir juga, kenapa aku asyik terserempak dia? Kenapa kami kerap bertemu? Is this what you call fate? Atau sekadar mainan constellation yang begitu berkecamuk sekarang?

Emran, Emran kalau dunia ini terbalik sudah lama aku remukkan hatimu.

Semalam tengok Nitrus perform. Well, kebetulan sebenarnya. I was at OU to have dinner with my ex boss (tempat mengadu utama tentang kerja) and there they were, Nitrus OK, tengah sound check at Good Evening Bangkok. Woo! By the time we finished dinner, I went back to GEB tapi Nitrus sudah perform halfway. So I don’t know whether they performed ‘Kamu’ atau tidak. But their other songs are good as well (and the lead singer is kinda cute hee hee). Siapa kata saya tak support the local music industry hey.

I am subjected to a kelas bahasa satu hari satu jam with my boss.
Faham tak tekanan perasaan yang saya alami ketika ini?

Kalau nyanyi lagu Negaraku out of tune tu masih boleh diterima lagi. Tapi ada satu line tu dia* nyanyi tune tu memang salah! It's not supposed to sound like that!

Is this as bad as not remembering your Rukunegara?

* Psst, dia Datuk Zulhasnan.

So kita dah ada catch phrase baru lah. “I sound like stupid if I speak in Malay”

Semalam di kelab malam (wakaka), si Encik Transformers bawak sekali minah rempit mana ntah yang dia pikap di bar yang sama the week before (ini satu fenomena yang harus diteliti). Bukan kami tak nak bercakap dengan minah itu, tetapi dia sangat unreceptive. Kot ye pun, cubalah beramah mesra sikit dengan kami-kami ini. Cik Freckles pun tak suka dia sebab bila tanya sepatah, dia jawab sepatah. Tambahan pula, Cik Freckles bengang dengan Minah Rempit itu kerana ada ka Minah Rempit itu sangkakan Cik Freckles is a secretary. Hello! Dia engineer ok!

Lepas tu, Cik Freckles bisik kat aku. ”She doesn’t speak English ok”.
Aku pulak dengan semputnya menjawab dengan kuat “It’s not like I don’t want to talk to her? But I sound like stupid if I speak in Malay”. Hehe.
Badabing!

Thanks a lot Sharifah Amani. I still don’t agree with your smart mouth but thanks for the excellent phrase anyway.

p/s: Iye, iye, jangan tanya lagi. Yes, saya sakit. Yes, I am losing weight. No, I cant do anything about the bags under my eyes. Jangan ingat saya suka berkeadaan begini.